


One By One

by itsalexhenry



Category: Game Grumps
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Body Image, Egobang - Freeform, M/M, Post-Break Up, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-29
Updated: 2017-09-29
Packaged: 2019-01-06 20:07:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,008
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12218004
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/itsalexhenry/pseuds/itsalexhenry
Summary: Suzy had wanted a break, Arin hadn’t. They’d been apart for around two weeks now, and at first Arin seemed fine with it all. He went on with his duties around the Grump office like it was no big deal – Hell, he even spoke to Suzy sometimes. Nobody’d asked Arin anything about it; they’d just assumed. It had hurt Arin more than anything in the world.





	One By One

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first fic here pls let me know if u want more!!!

Dan let out a content sigh, stretching himself out across the couch. They’d just wrapped up on an episode of Sonic Unleashed, and it’d been pretty stressful even to watch. It was over now, though – he looked at the younger man next to him with a lazy grin. Arin had his head turned as he fiddled with some wires on the microphone. 

“I’m glad we’re done with that bullshit for today,” Dan huffed with a smile. “Really takes a toll on you, huh?” He watched Arin with anticipation. Maybe they’d order takeout after this – it was getting pretty late anyway, and he knew Thai food would definitely cheer Arin up.

Dan did not expect what happened next. Arin put his controllers to one side and tore into tears, shaking with sobs as he buried his face in his hands. Dan was dumbfounded for a moment, before quickly shuffling closer to Arin and draping an arm across his shoulders. 

“Arin? Are you okay?” Dan asked worriedly, his brows furrowed. He rubbed small circles into Arin’s shoulder, a sick feeling in his stomach. Arin had never had a moment like this just randomly before, and it scared him. He ran through all of the possible problems in his mind. “Is it- is it about Suzy?” He finally asked in a softer voice.

Suzy had wanted a break, Arin hadn’t. They’d been apart for around two weeks now, and at first Arin seemed fine with it all. He went on with his duties around the Grump office like it was no big deal – Hell, he even spoke to Suzy sometimes. Nobody’d asked Arin anything about it; they’d just assumed. It had hurt Arin more than anything in the world. 

Arin looked up at Dan, hot tears streaming down his face. “It’s not j-just about Suze.” He admitted weakly. He choked back another sob as he tried to communicate with Dan. “This game- I’m-“ He pointed at the TV, which was still on the pause screen for Sonic Unleashed. “I’m fucking shit at it, I keep dying because I’m only half paying attention, and everyone hates me!” He started sobbing, Dan taking it upon himself to pull Arin into a warm hug. It was true; they had gotten a lot of angry emails already about how bad Arin was at playing the game, and comments like that hurt Arin occassionally – but never like this. There was something more. Dan continued to rub circles into Arin’s back, his heart sinking at the hoarse sobs coming from the younger man. 

“Hey, not everyone hates you. I sure don’t.” Dan frowned, pulling back from Arin to look at his face. He had bits of hair stuck to his face. Dan gently moved the strands back into place. “Are you sure it’s not about anything else?” He asked quietly, studying Arin’s face. Arin’s brow twitched, which was always a key sign that he was lying. 

“What if she already found someone else?” Arin said in the smallest voice, sniffling. Dan’s heart dropped to his stomach. Arin really hadn’t wanted Suzy to go. “What if- What if we have to get a divorce?” Arin looked fearful, his hands beginning to shake.

“Isn’t that what breaks are for?” Dan tried not to sound harsh, but the words cut through the air as they reached Arin. Arin, of course, started sobbing again, grabbing a nearby cushion for support. He buried his face into the pillowed surface to muffle his sobs. “Hey, no...” Dan tried to go back, the guilt rising in his chest. “I’m sure Suzy still loves you. She’s just working things out right now – you were fine last time, right?”

This only made Arin sob more. Dan watched in horror as he held Arin tightly to his chest, not even sure of what he could say to cheer him up. He needed a response from Arin. 

“Last time we weren’t married.” Arin said glumly, his voice cracking. “And last time, I didn’t weigh over 200 pounds.” He sniffled and held back another sob. Dan stroked Arin’s back, thinking for a moment. 

“What does that matter?” Dan asked in a softer voice. He knew that Arin struggled with diets a Hell of a lot recently, but he had no clue how hard the topic had hit Arin.

“She’s tired of me. I’m tired of myself, too.” Arin admitted, mumbling the words into Dan’s shoulder. Dan opened his mouth to argue, but Arin interrupted him. “At least I was attractive back then. Now I’m just fucking... fat as shit. And I’m not even talented. I don’t do half of the shit I used to do.” Arin was sobbing again. “I can’t-“ He took a big breath in. “Even the lovelies know. Suzy doesn’t love me anymore because I’ve got nothing going for me.” He looked at Dan, desperate. “You think so too, right?” 

Dan had an unreadable expression on his face, which only cemeted Arin’s doubt more. Without a word, Dan stood up and offered Arin his arm. “Come on.” He said bluntly, his eyes watching the floor. Arin weakly stood and hooked himself around Dan’s arm.

Dan walked them into the Grump office. “We’re going out.” He called through the office. Suzy lifted her head up, but she couldn’t see Arin, so she didn’t ask. Dan dragged Arin through the building until they reached Dan’s car. He unlocked the vehicle and stepped into the driver’s seat.

All the while, Arin was terrified. He didn’t know where they were going. He obediently sat in the passenger seat and put his seatbelt on without haste, looking at Dan. “Dan...?” He asked, the anxiety overcoming his sadness for the time being. Dan started up the car and began driving.

“Sorry,” Dan sighed, both eyes on the road. “Sorry. We’re going to my house, okay? I just didn’t want anyone in the office to catch you like this. I know how you get about all of that.” He explained. Arin felt his heart melt – Dan cared. Dan listened to him. He relaxed in his seat and stared out of the window. 

Half an hour later, they were both on Dan’s couch; same story, different couch. Arin was sobbing yet again, nearly forgetting why he was crying in the first place. Dan hugged him close, encouraging him to let it all out. 

“Sometimes I think I’d be better off gone.” Arin sighed into Dan’s shoulder. Dan quickly pulled back to look at Arin seriously. 

“Gone?” He questioned, the fear rising within him. “From Grumps?” He hoped. Arin looked at his hands and swallowed hard. 

“From life.” Arin took a sharp breath in. He promptly started crying again, and he wondered if he’d ever run out of tears. Dan squeezed Arin tightly, unaware that Arin even felt this bad. What did he miss?

“That’s not happening.” Dan whispered, his throat tight. “It’s not an option.” He could hear Arin sobbing softly between them.

“It could and it is.” Arin argued, looking up at Dan. Dan seemed angry now. He shook his head.

“It is fucking not.” He growled. He saw the expression on Arin’s face shift to fear and he softened a little. “Shit, I’m sorry, man.” He mumbled. Arin shook his head quickly. 

“No, you’re right to be angry.” Arin admitted weakly, the tears stopping. “It’s my fault I’m like this. I’d be more successful if I didn’t give up at the one thing that got me somewhere in the first place.”

“Arin, you-“ Dan started, but was interrupted again. 

“People would actually like me if I weren’t so shit at video games.”

“Arin-“ Dan started again, but was still interrupted.

“And Suzy wouldn’t have broken up with me if I weren’t so horribly fucking obese.”

_“Big cat.”_ Dan sighed, his heart dropping to his stomach. “Let’s tackle this one by one, yeah?” He asked, watching Arin for a response. Arin sighed again, looking down. “I’m gonna need you to be on board for this.” Dan gently reached a hand out to Arin’s face, tilting it so that he was looking straight at Dan. Arin nodded, and Dan took his hand away. 

“Video games are fuckin’ hard.” Dan began, with a smile. “And you’re going through a tonne of shit right now, so it’s understandable that you’re not focused.” Dan said. Arin nodded slowly. “If you want, we can tell the lovelies that you’re not feeling good. Maybe they’ll ease up a bit. Or we could just leave the series for a while.” Dan suggested. Arin shrugged. “All aboard, buddy.” Dan raised an eyebrow, expecting a better response. Arin rolled his eyes. 

“I don’t want people to worry.” Arin fiddled with a handful of fabric he was gripping from the bottom of Dan’s shirt. Dan nodded in understanding. 

“I get that. But sometimes people worry for a reason. And it’s better to let them know something’s up than let them believe that you’re just shit at video games.” Dan smiled.

“Okay.” Arin responded quietly. Dan reached over and held Arin’s hand, squeezing it. 

“Cool! And you should never look back on the past.” Dan pointed a finger at him, grinning. “You started as an animator, but you’re here now. You even said animating was your gateway to voice acting, and you’re doing tonnes of that now!” Dan smiled happily.

“That’s true.” Arin smiled back. 

“And I don’t know what happened with Suzy.” Dan admitted gently, Arin’s face falling a little. “I’m sure she has her reasons, though. I can assure you that you’re not obese. Or horribly obese.” Dan looked over Arin. Arin’s weight had been fluctuating a lot in recent months, but he’d never been anything over 230lbs. “And we all love you for your personality and not your pants size.” 

Arin fell quiet. It looked like he was having a hard time believing Dan. “But the lovelies-“

Dan shook his head and held Arin’s hand with both hands. “Lovelies don’t put you down- those aren’t lovelies.” Dan explained with a frown. “And they don’t mean shit, okay? I assure you that nobody in the office cares about shit like that. Not even Suzy. She has her own problems anyway, right? So she’d have no reason to judge you.”

Arin went quiet again, but he was nodding along. 

“And I personally think you’re still attractive.” Dan felt himself blush as he said it. “I like that you’re big and strong.” He giggled. “My big strong maaaaan.” He drawled in an overdone Jersey accent. Arin laughed in embarrassment, covering his mouth with his hand. Dan was happy to hear him laugh. “So fuck everyone, right?”

“You really think I’m _attractive _?” Arin asked, raising an eyebrow. Dan nodded in response. “I think you’re pretty.” He smiled.__

__“What is this, compliment wars?” Dan chimed with laughter. “You’re such a dork.”_ _

__Arin settled into comfortable laughter with Dan. They both quietened and watched each other, Dan still holding Arin’s hand. Arin felt fear. Dan was confused._ _

__“Can I kiss you?” Arin asked, out of the blue. Dan blinked and stared at Arin in shock. Arin looked worried. “If- If not-“_ _

__“Yes.” Dan said quickly. “I just- didn’t expect that, ‘cos like-“_ _

__Before Dan could even finish, Arin had his lips on Dan’s. His moustache tickled at Dan’s upper lip. It was only a quick kiss, but afterwards both men were flustered. Arin tucked his hair behind his ear, embarrassed._ _

__“Was that okay?” Arin asked. He felt like a he had a high school crush again. Dan chuckled._ _

__“Yeah, it was okay.” He smirked. Then he waved his hand and they both fell into hysterics._ _

__Moments later, they were cuddled up into the sofa, Dan placed behind Arin with an arm over him. Arin smiled softly as Dan stroked his side._ _

__“What does this make us?” Arin asked, watching the TV in front of them. They’d settled down after a Hell of a lot of Thai food. Dan pondered before answering._ _

__“Let’s take it easy... baby steps.” He reached over and squeezed Arin’s hand. “One by one.”_ _


End file.
